Bonsai, literally translated from the Japanese as “tray planting,” is the ancient art of growing trees in shallow pots, maintaining them so they never develop beyond miniature scale. Bonsai has now become a popular hobby among many in the West, and although it seems like an innocent enough venture, Bonsai fanaticism has a potentially dangerous dark side. If you know someone interested in growing bonsai trees, read this guide to the hobby’s eventual progression, so you can step in before it’s too late.
The process begins simply enough when the bonsai enthusiast decides to cultivate a bonsai tree. He researches the proper care and maintenance, learning the methods of pruning and shaping to achieve a proper bonsai tree. He finds that bonsai trees require an inordinate amount of care and he will lavish that care. To his delight, his tree develops beautifully, developing tiny leaves and bark.
However, that will soon not be enough. His hobby moves into its second stage when he decides that he must have multiple bonsai trees. He sends out for seeds and clippings from other trees to plant in his bonsai trays. He plants coniferous and deciduous trees—trees from across the world and from down the street. He plants an entire grove of miniature bonsai fruit trees, approaching the limits of his small apartment.
Now begins the third stage, as the enthusiast begins to clear space in his apartment by slowly selling off his furniture. He begins to set his bonsai trees out across the apartment floor, creating a forest beneath his feet. His preference for small versions of things will become all the more obvious when he purchases dollhouses to build in the clearings. He then lays out a layer of soil and peat across his apartment floor, only a few inches deep. He plants his trees in this shallow layer of earth and covers his walls and ceiling with a mural of the sky.
Having created a miniature domain, the bonsai enthusiast will naturally seek to populate it, in the fourth stage. Although many different types of small animals could be used—hermit crabs, small lizards, frogs—he most likely chooses mice. Having acquired a dozen or so mice, the enthusiast then retreats back into his apartment biome, turning his back on civilization. His journeys into the outside world will decrease in length and frequency at this time, until they stop completely.
At this point, the fifth stage, the enthusiast’s entire focus is on maintaining his diminutive ecosystem. The mice, clever creatures that they are, are soon trained to reside in the dollhouses and harvest the tiny bonsai fruit. Free from natural predators, the mice flourish and civilize. They develop primitive communication and begin to regard the bonsai enthusiast as a sort of god. They praise him and offer sacrifices to him, which he takes and eats, residing on his bed and surveying his creation.
In the sixth stage, the bonsai enthusiast has contented himself with sitting and watching as the world he has set in motion slowly unfolds. The mice, having worked out their own systems of agriculture, are now in charge of maintaining the forests. They have progressed extraordinarily as a culture, producing great works of art and writing. Some of the writers begin questioning the existence of the giant man whom they have been worshiping. The enthusiast wishes to remind them that he is so close at hand, but he has become disconnected and is afraid of upsetting their society’s balance. As their collective memories of the enthusiast blur, the mice search for meaning in everything they do. One mouse decides that he will content himself with some sort of personal pursuit. He takes a few clippings from one of the trees and plants them in a shallow pot, carefully pruning and shaping his creation—a miniature tree.
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